Welcome to Holland

Somewhere I read this story on a blog. Today my mom sent it to me in an email. The story really hits home to me. Even though my children don't have disabilities like the author of the poem I think it can also be related to being adoptive parents. Like my mom said, it sure puts a different spin on things. Enjoy!


Welcome To Holland
by
Emily Perl Kingsley

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It’s just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Oh no, the big 4-0!

Finally 1. grandpa brought over the cord to the camera and 2. I had time to upload the pictures to share here. On Thanksgiving we also got to celebrate Daryle's 40th birthday! Yes, I am married to a 40 year old now!! Travis and I decorated the house the night before and among his presents was a necklace and light up button that he was to wear for the day. Well, he wore them for a bit... he was a very good sport. I told him just to save it all and give it back to me when I turn 40, which won't be for at least 14 more months! Here is the birthday boy himself: Of course we had to have birthday cake along with our pumpkin pie. Travis insisted we make dad a cake. I love this one of my boys together just as we started to sing and blow out candles.

Here is a sample of what Daryle woke up to. I love decorating with a 7 year old. He just stuck tape on things and then stuck on the balloons. Instant decorations!

Travis had a turn with the camera. I love seeing things from his perspective. I guess this is what the counter looks like to him!

After Thanksgiving ended we started to get the house ready for Christmas. I am hoping to finish this weekend. At least the outside and the tree are done. Connor got his first taste of hot chocolate.... I will let you decided for yourself whether or not he liked it...He is now addicted to marshmallows! Travis also decorated his little tree for his room. I tell you, when I decorate with him I have to bite my lip. A lot. He refused to let me fluff out the branches and he chose each ornament for the tree. I do like how he chose the nativity picture to put towards the top (he made that when he was 4 or 5). He quietly took all of his ornaments into his room and worked HARD on this little tree. It is hard to see in the picture but he has all these little picture frame ornaments all along the bottom. The branches are just sagging! I love it! We did decide to put it up on his bookshelf though... just to keep the little guy from checking it out too closely! (It was then that I had to rescue the tree a little bit and fluff out some branches.... I just could not resist!) It seems he picked some of the most heaviest ornaments as well. However, the little white dog in the bottom right corner was made for me by my Great Grandma Melzer. I just love that I have things like that around to share with my kids!Now tonight, a week later, we went to the town celebration. I got this cute picture of the boys as we were waiting to sit on Santa's lap. Travis picked up Connor and they smiled so perfectly!

Even though this is not Connor's first Christmas it is his first Christmas where he is starting to understand things. For example, Santa. He was SOOO excited to see the guy in the red suit. He kept waving to him and when it was their turn he just ran up to him like they were long lost friends. Travis was a good big brother and helped translate a few things for Connor to Santa.

I love how in our pictures Santa is giving the kids such expression as they tell him what they want for Christmas. Connor would like a green garbage truck. Travis wants a pillow pet and a basketball hoop for outside. We will see how good they have been when Christmas morning arrives!

And here is the happy little family. It was so hard to get both kids to look at the camera at the same time with tons of people walking around. At least they are both smiling.

One awesome thing for me was last Sunday I submitted my final assignment for my last class. Two weeks from tonight I will officially have graduated with my Master's degree in Education. It has been a long 2 and a half years... the end has finally come!! Now to figure out to do with my new found "free time". Haha!! That just means I will find something else to dig into I guess. It will be great to spend more time with my family. I can't wait!!

Patiently waiting....

I have some REALLY cute pictures from Daryle's **40th** birthday and Thanksgiving. Unfortunatly I don't have the cord to Grandpa's camera at my house. Why didn't I remember to just get it this afternoon?? AAHHH!! Oh well.... maybe he will bring it by tomorrow??? ;-)

Neat Nick Pig Song- they are too funny!

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing

It's A Barnyard Moo-sical!

Yesterday Travis' class had their annual program at school. They all looked soooo cute in their outfits as the different animals. We have been hearing all about this for months now. It turned out so good! Travis' class were the neat-nick pigs. I have never seen Travis in pink before, so once my eyes adjusted and got used to it he actually looked pretty cute!
Here are all four classes together. One class were chickens, another were cows, and the other were goats... who love to cook! (That is why they were chefs!)

Of course all the grandparents were there along with Daddy and Connor. Travis' rooting section was well represented! Now we can focus on Thanksgiving and Daryle's birthday... both of which are tomorrow. Here are a few crafty things the boys have made so far this holiday season. I am pretty impressed with both of their talents!

Isn't Connor's little hand turkey the cutest thing ever??!!

He also made this darling turkey that has been hanging on our refrigerator all month. He is so proud. Every time he sees it he points and says, "I did it!!" as he has a smile a mile wide across his face.

Travis made this cute Indian boy. He had a belt with beads on it but Connor got a hold of it before me, and, well, you know how things go with a two year old in the house! lol Tomorrow will be pretty busy for us as we celebrate Thanksgiving and Daryle's 40th birthday! Yes, it is a milestone one for him this year. Right now Travis is blowing up balloons to put up around the house. He is so excited. He even insisted that we wrap each individual thing we got him so that "It looks like so much!" One thing is for sure, Travis loves a good birthday celebration! We bought some decorations to put up around the house as a little reminder for him. All.Day.Long! I can't wait! It should be a good day of food, family, friends and of course... football! Happy Thanksgiving to all!

Mornings

Morning time has been going more smoothly around here for the past few days. (With that being said, I sure hope I didn't just jinx myself!) For months mornings have been rough. When Connor first came home Travis had *some* control issues. He had to be up before Connor. He had to choose what Connor ate (never mind that Connor already knew what he wanted to eat and Travis would insist on the opposite!). He wanted to dress him (against Connor's will). He wanted to control what was on the tv. Or what music was playing on the CD player. Where I sat. Where Connor sat. Well, I think you get the picture! Travis just could not, would not give Connor some space. Gradually over time Travis has learned to let go and just let Connor make his own decisions. Once I let Travis fix Connor's breakfast and help out things seemed to get better. Just when those problems were resolving a new crop appeared. A few months ago Connor decided to start climbing out of his crib. We had to take down the side rail and convert it to a toddler bed. Thus began "freedom" time for Connor! He was waking up in the middle of the night, turning on lights, tv, playing, etc. After a few weeks of that he started sleeping all night. Then began the waking up at 4:30 in the morning routine. That was enough to do us all in!! Then FINALLY it happened! Last week Connor began sleeping until about 6:00 in the morning. This was great as it allowed me to get up, showered, and dressed BEFORE having to watch Connor (and make sure he didn't run out into the backyard! One morning he did get out, he was not dressed because he ran away from me as I was dressing him. He ran to the swing and then declared "TOO COLD! I GET DRESSED NOW!" He finally figured it out and hasn't done it again since. lol) I really hope that the sleeping until 6 or 6:30 continues. One morning this past week Travis woke up first. Connor slept until 6:45... Hallelujah! When he woke up he ran to Travis, gave him a BIG bear hug and they sat on the floor and cuddled. Of course it was a Kodak moment. (Don't laugh. Moments like these are few and far between, I need to record them to prove to myself that they actually happened!!) I can handle more mornings like this! Even though motherhood can be quite stressful, I am so thankful for these two blessings in my life. I can't imagine what life would be like without them! Even though they can make me feel like I am going crazy some days I wouldn't trade them for anything else in the world!

Randomness

It seems like we have been busy around here. I am not sure exactly what we have been doing but I know that the minute my head hits the pillow I am out like a light! It may have something to do with the fact that Connor has been waking up somewhere between 4:30 and 5:30...and there is NO putting him back to bed. No way. No how. He is up and ready to rumble! This morning was wonderful... he slept until 6 am! Way to go! I was actually all showered and dressed by the time he got up today. I hope this trend continues. I like it much better.
The boys have been playing in the backyard a lot. The weather has been absolutely beautiful and they both LOVE to be outside. I like it when they are outside too. (Except of course when they decide to throw limes over the fence into the neighbor's yard... yes even Connor can throw high enough to make it over!)

This weekend Daryle made his "famous" chili for a day of football. He is really quite funny when he cooks. He cut up all of the veggies just perfectly. I had to take a picture. Looks like it should be in a cookbook somewhere.

Travis has officially been bitten by the football bug. That is all he wants to play. This weekend he donned this delightful outfit and started making some poses. I guess I will have to sign him up for flag football next year. Sigh. He loves playing and evidently he is pretty good. (So says his daddy, grandpa, and our neighbor.) I of course just see a 7 year old boy playing ball and having a good time.

Then I caught Travis taping this to his bottom. He is too much sometimes!

Oh goodness. He is even getting Connor in on the action. Travis will throw the ball and tell me "Look mom, it's a spiral!" So then Connor picks up the ball, yells "Spiral!" and the ball goes about one foot in front of him. It is so cute. He adores his big brother and tries to do everything he does. Sometimes I can't wait for them to get "just a little older" and then other times I just want to freeze them like they are right now. Everybody knows they grow up fast enough as it is!